What’s the stage in between puberty and menopause? Oh um, being a woman. Being a crazy, difficult, emotionally unstable, balanced on the outside, female human being appearing to look well-balanced on most work days. I’ve just had a hard time admitting it.

Till I find myself watching Friends With Benefits, trying to find the meaning of life from a movie that only got a 6.6/10 rating from 51,063 users on IMDb.com. I then make up my own theory of what the Chaos theory is really all about, while lying in bed chewing Mint-Chocolate-Chip ice cream flavored chewing gum, while contemplating paying a psychic $170 for a 3 hour sessions, which will in turn help me discover how to balance my chakras and take away this chaos which is suffocating me.

I then realize the last sentence was way too long and I forgot to take a new breath in between full stops, which is maybe the real reason why I am feeling suffocated.

I’m hungry again. It has been about 20 minutes since I last ate. I either have a very fast metabolism or I just have no self control. I would like to think a bit of both but we all know it is because I have a fast metabolism.

We all also know the reason why my size 2 pants no longer fit is because the whole world got bigger but my pants did not get the memo. I want the world to stop. I had the best weekend. I smiled a lot.

I cried a lot last week. I don’t think I am that great at this thing called life but hopefully in 2012, I’ll improve. My friend and I made a deal on staying positive.

I guess wanting the world to stop isn’t part of the deal. According to a friend, tonight the galaxy will meet with a “big solar storm”. Earth, however, will not be hit. I am now going to Google this, and if it does hit, then these shall be my last words:

We got hit by a big solar storm.